


(A Flower That Bloomed In The Dark) My Beautiful Black Pearl

by NoctisXit



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Angst, Character Death, Drama & Romance, Hopeful Ending, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Minor Violence, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:21:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28973511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoctisXit/pseuds/NoctisXit
Summary: "... And as reality fell appart around them, Grimmjow didn't let go, drinking the small whines Ichigo made, drowning himself in the other, holding him in a way that he hoped showed all of his passion and desire and shame.Wishing that, through this gesture, he could make up for a bit of the sorrow he caused him."
Relationships: Grimmjow Jaegerjaques/Kurosaki Ichigo
Kudos: 30





	(A Flower That Bloomed In The Dark) My Beautiful Black Pearl

_ There was said to be a pearl, peculiar both in color and ability, for it could grant the wish of whoever obtained it, created by ancient deities of smoke and spirit, protected by fire and sunlight, ubication changing over the years, never seen twice in the same place, few have managed to hold it and even less of those have managed to get that what they desired, for the pearl is powerful, but also capricious, it had to be granted not taken by force, deemed had to be the humans that yearned to use its powers, if they were proven unworthy or refused to let the judgement take place, taking the pearl away from the protector by forceful means, their wish would not be granted as they demanded, and they would live to regret their cruel obtainment of the artifact. _

_ Those had been said, and so it shall be. Fortune would reach those who received the pearl in good faith, and suffer would do those who took it by their own selfishness.  _

_ Search to the depths of earth, for the black pearl, for it will grant the brave and determined what they desire. _

From that ancient scroll of rules and regulations, lost to the hands of time and mortals, just that last bit of text remained, ripped and maimed, stolen time and time again, by the men that ached to achieve something, righteous or immoral, necessary for others or for themselves. Grimmjow read the fragment time and time again, brow furrowed, eyes blazing with doubt and a peculiar sense of foreboding, as a professional in the field of history, it wasn't necessarily strange to see him so fixated upon the writings that described such an ancient artifact, what was unusual, however, was that said artifact turned out to be jewel of any sort, instead of a weapon or a type of fighting style lost by the progress or disappearance of a culture, considering those were the main areas of interest and expertise of the youngman. He could still justify his odd fixation in regard of that particular scroll by saying the object described on it was the key to some major events and tragedies vaguely discovered between the few remains of the Hollow civilization that had been found throughout the years, considering the amount of conflict and fighting that appeared to accompany its members, and that clearly provided in spades the subjects Grimmjow felt more interested in, but it didn't really matter what fible explanation he tried to make up for his unhealthy interest for this scroll in particular, and more importantly, the object described in it. 

The  _ Perla Negra _ or  _ Perla de la Tragedia Béndita,  _ something more out of a fairytale or nonsensical myth that were so popular and revered in the past, it was fully out of sync with the brutally human subjects that tended to interest him, Grimmjow could admit that much, but there was still something oddly… personal that demanded his focus on the matter, a pull he had felt only once, before, related to  _ someone _ rather than  _ something,  _ but still… damn it! He needed to focus, he shook his head, willing thoughts of honey eyes and sunlight away, he would get revenge from the other for taking so much space on his mind when he saw him, because it was especially hard to make sense of an unexplainable obsession, when another obsession of similar nature tried to gain attention as well. 

_ Fuck,  _ damned Kurosaki and damned pearl, the worst part was knowing that there was a conection between both of the ghosts plagging his mind, an odd sense of deja-vu whose belivable origin still elluded him, because he was not ready to admit yet that, truthfully, and as ridiculous as it might sound, he had known the both of them before, time and time again, throughout a multitude of settings and stories, by visions of nightmares and daydreams, even if he felt both relieved and stupid when admitting it only to himself, because he knew that thinking something like that was a complete impossibility, the nearest thing to absolute insanity, worth of those obscure blogs created by people drowned in delusions of conspiracies and past lifes. 

Grimmjow snorted, albeit forcefully and reluctantly, because that was exactly how he had felt he'd been acting for the last few months, sighing in frustration, he slumped in the chair he was occupying, looking towards the wall next to his desk, to the proof of his own shame, in the form of various descriptions and drawings and annotations, a photograph or two as well, some neat and others more erratic, barely coherent in his desperation to put them on paper after waking up in the middle of the night, there was barely an understandable order, most of the pieces were connected by threads of wool of certain tones, in his attempt to put together the remnants of the very specific 'fantasies' conjured by his mind, though he had to admit it, with each minute he spend dedicating himself to the nonsense in that wall, he became more and more convinced that he was not creating convoluted lies fueled by some special case of paranoia, but rather piecing together the scattered realities of at least four different life-times that were  _ his,  _ like far of memories that came back to him. 

_ As a warning. _

Grimmjow snarled, suddenly very uncomfortable in his own skin, angry at the prospect that, maybe, he was truly somehow behind the actions held together by the notes and threads, he shuddered, looking down at the document he had been analyzing, frowning a bit more, it was maddening, feeling the urge to leave behind everything and search for the myth described in the piece of paper, the jewel that could concede any wish, he allowed himself just a second to think of the possibility of his existence, the rewards of finding it, that, maybe, just  _ maybe,  _ it was the last piece he needed to put together the mystery that had been haunting him. 

That,  _ maybe,  _ he could wish for the answers that he needed to put his mind at ease. 

He scribbled a new note hastily, standing up and moving towards the wall, putting of his latest addition to the clusterfuck, right under the piece of paper that read  _ 'Stupid Pearl'  _ and next to the photograph of a smiling youngman, marked with the name  _ 'Ichigo',  _ Grimmjow felt an unexplainable surge of guilt, like he sometimes did when watching for too long at the other man, and he rubbed at his eyes forcefully, stumbling backwards, he had to do something about this whole mess, or risk truly going insane. 

_ And hurting him again.  _

He hissed, afronted by the thought, and by the depictions of murder and tragedy connecting heavily to the picture of the smiling redhead, all commited by the same motive, as a casualty more than an actual objective on its own, but just as condeming, it was all for the pearl,  _ daming.  _

_ His opportunity to get answers.  _

Grimmjow took a final look at the wall, the pearl and the picture, and not being able to confront the demons hanging there for any longer, he stormed out. 

He had a myth to chase down, and a boyfriend to see. 

[...] 

Grimmjow was oficially taking the lead, clutching the latest clue he had found in regards of the last known location of the pearl, somewhere along the expanses of Hueco Mundo, truly the guys he got if from had been too stupid to not realize that boasting about the richness they were soon to acquire thanks to the jewel most desired by every person that have heard of its existence, was just a one way to ticket to getting robbed and killed by someone lacking enough morals to take for themselves whatever information they have managed to get. 

To their bad luck, Grimmjow had been just a few tables away when they have deemed a good idea to impress the woman serving their drinks, and well, he had seen an opportunity and took it, too bad for the poor idiots now laying somewhere in the desert, soon to be buried beneath the white sands. Grimmjow would feel guilty about it, but truly, they only have themselves to blame. 

And in any case, his wish was far more important than whatever the hell those weaklings had been thinking to ask for. Spending his whole life between the eternity of a dark sky and the void of a desert that threatened to end you if you ever thought of trying to walk through it had proven to be a particular kind of hell, and Grimmjow was ready to do whatever was necessary to make it out of there, and if he needed to wish for a heart to do it, so be it. 

Who would have thought that fate was on his side? 

His one chance of success apparently being somewhere among the streets of Las Noches, Grimmjow had only needed to get some supplies and then he was ready to enter the ruins of the abandoned citadel and get his prize. The white walls remained impressive despite the state of abandonment and harshness of the elements throughout the last few centuries, being that what was left of the  _ Hollows  _ had been doing their best to prolong the life of their culture despite the less than ideal life conditions provided by the desert, Grimmjow knew the place had been raided and stripped bare of any object of value or usefulness, what once had been the centerpiece of one of the strongest kingdoms to exist, was now just the proof of their decadence, and maybe, the tomb of a last hope. 

The idea made him snort, as he turned another corner, torch poised in front of him to light his way, pausing momentarily when a different sound than those made by the crackling of the flame he was using and his own steps, reached him. He scowled, trying to determine the place from where the… ¿humming? Was coming from, reaching out for the blade he always carried with him (along some other things), starting to trek forward cautiously, he stopped again a few steps away from the next turn of the hall, noticing the glow of another torch and the fact the humming had stopped too. Seems like a fight was unavoidable after all, the prospect made Grimmjow smile, kind of wicked and feral, as he hurried along the rest of the way, turning around sharply and bringing his blade forward, certain and deadly. 

The distinctive sound of metal clashing and grinding filled the somber space, as azure and hazel eyes met for the first time, pulse quickening, breath turning erratic, and bodies moving almost by instinct as a fight broke out, swords encountered as attacks were exchanged, hits and slashes being given and received. 

Frenetic and going on and on, like a deadly dance only the both of them managed to understand. 

"You know," Grimmjow said at some point, grinning like a mad man as he parries the next blow thrown by the pretty stranger "If I didn't know there was a very valuable treasure hidden somewhere along this place, I would have taken you instead." 

The stranger huffed something similar to an amused sound "Is that an attempt of flattery or something?" 

Oh,  _ oh.  _ "You've got words as sharp as that sword of yours, don't ya?" 

"Sure." The boy answers, smirking, eyes looking almost like honey, mocking and impressed and  _ pleased,  _ Grimmjow allowed himself just one second to admire the scene in front of him, mesmerized, barely catching the edge of the sword coming at him "That is a compliment I can take!" 

"Picky even for words, huh?" He snickers, feeling something warm and  _ foreign  _ surging from his chest, posture relaxed before he answers the most recent attack, throwing his whole weight as he was met head on "I think I like that!" 

The both of them held their ground, iron grinding, bodies taut. Interested and joyous. 

By the end of their confrontation, they both were resting against the cool grounds of the palace, illuminated only by the rays of moonlight filtering through the holes spread around the walls, heated skin and satisfied exhaustion, the wounds acquired were not exactly severe, so neither of them showed any kind of urgency in moving, somehow, Grimmjow felt they had managed to develop a bit of mutual respect and trust during the sparring they have exchanged. A stupid idea, obviously, Grimmjow  _ didn't do _ trust, but he had honor as a warrior, and he could tell the other man,  _ Ichigo,  _ as he had presented himself at some point while they laid down, too tired and  _ achy  _ to keep standing, was actually a good person in general,  _ nice.  _ A complete idiot. 

No surprise Grimmjow had not seen him before, he was most certainly an outsider, pretty little thing, he almost appeared to  _ glow _ somehow, good thing he was such a great fighter, or he would have been dead by now. 

"So…" Ichigo started, pushing himself up slowly, massaging muscles and stretching his limbs, wincing from time to time, keeping an eye on his unexpected rival, seeing him follow his example of sitting up "What's the treasure you mentioned before?" 

Gimmjow tensed up by the question, before turning his expression into something petulant "That's none of your fucking bussiness." 

"True," Ichigo agreed simply, nodding "I was just curious." He assures, adding later "And I'm not here searching for any treasure, is that what you are so worried about." Grinning. 

The sight made Grimmjow snort "What are you doing here, then?" He answers instead, curious, but feigning disinterest. 

Ichigo snickers at the obvious facade, shrugging with simplicity "I'm just looking for a peaceful place to pass the time." 

"Really?" Grimmjow almost choked himself with a sound of disbelief, he might have laughed too, just a little "And you thought that  _ fucking  _ Hueco Mundo was the place to go?" 

"For your information, I had not ran into anyone until you decided to play 'treasure hunter' and showed up here, thank you very much!" 

Grimmjow laughs at that "Is that so? No wonder you are still alive." 

"Yeah? Well, if things around here are as much of a threat as you, I don't think I will have any trouble staying alive." The redhead responds, smugness almost radiating off of him as he looked at Grimmjow mockingly. 

Grimmjow snarled "Want me to tear you apart, you little shit?" He hissed, standing up, with his blade in hand. 

"Nah," The male with hazel answers, standing up as well, placatingly, and dusting his pants off, walking to where he had left his belongings when their fight had broken out, picking them up and rummaging around "I still have a journey to continue, you know?" He sighed, a wistful expression overtaking his features as he pulled out something from the sack that carried his things, Grimmjow squinted, the object was small and round, reflecting the pale light that reached it, it… 

It looked like a pearl. 

Grimmjow's eyes got wide with disbelief as he stumbled forward,  _ it… It couldn't be, could it?  _ But with every step forward, the clearer the details become, by color alone, the jewel could have been mistaken for obsidian, but the shape was just too precise, too  _ natural,  _ to be anything but a pearl. It exuded a certain kind of energy, distinctive and god-like, Grimmjow felt drunk in power just by staring at it, he stretched his hand towards it, surroundings disappearing as all of his attention was taken by the pearl and then…

It disappeared, trapped between nimble fingers as they turned into a fist, Grimmjow's breath hitched, gaze flickering quickly towards the face of the other male, finding him oblivious to his intentions and distracted by whatever else he thought was a possession of value, a second later, the man with hazel eyes was nodding, pleased, before closing his bag and throwing its straps over his shoulder. 

"Well, I guess it was nice meeting you or something, but I gotta get moving." He turned to look at him, eyes meeting, Grimmjow saw the amused smile making the features of the youngman look softer, pretty, he felt the same mysterious sensation spread from his chest, but he found it difficult to concentrate when still trying to process the fact that he had been, and still was, so close to the thing that could grant him his wish, so he kept staring, dumbly, making Ichigo squirm before he turned around slowly, directing himself to one the nearest exist, taking off "Bye, then,  _ Grimmjow." _

Voice cheery, feet unnaturally quick among the sands, his hand never let go of the pearl. 

And with his leave, Grimmjow found himself snapping out of his stupor, stumbling as he hastily took hold of his own bag and moved to follow. 

When he made it out, the male with hazel eyes was already at a considerable distance, Grimmjow allowed himself to be marbled by the apparent ability the other had to move so easily between the desert, as he tried his best to catch up, movements clumsy and unpracticed do to his own hurry "Oi!" He blurted out, voice sharp with urgency, Ichigo turned to look at him, but he didn't slow down "Damn it!"

Grimmjow bristled, slowing down almost completely in an attempt to reach out for his belongings, feeling the familiar shape of his bow almost immediately and an arrow soon after, he pulled both of them quickly, discarding the rest of the bag carelessly as he stopped fully, standing proud and threatening as he prepared himself to shoot. 

In the distance, Ichigo stopped, freezing up in fear and confusion, the honesty on his expression made Grimmjow falter, and almost without noticing, he started to put the bow down, the gesture appeared to appease the other male a minute, a hesitant smile curving his lips as he brought up the hand Grimmjow knew was holding into the pearl, framed by the moon that always shone over Hueco Mundo. 

_ He was beautiful, _ Grimmjow thought, unique against the usual bleakness of the night and dessert, for a second, he felt distraught at the idea of depriving this world of that bit of colour that appeared to light up everything around him. But he remembered the pearl, still clutched firmly between those strong hands, protected and within his reach, and he remembered his own selfishness and drive, too, and then he was putting up the bow once again, hands steady as he pulled the string taut, the arrow gleamed cruelly under the rays of moonlight and he narrowed his eyes, letting go. 

Grimmjow ignored the look of shock, betrayal and hurt that flashed through hazel eyes, condemning and dimming slowly, and he ran, desperate, towards the spot where the youngman was dissolving, between rivulets of red that felt like a dead sentence, and he was choking between the smell of copper and loss. He picked through the sand, full or red, red,  _ red,  _ until he felt the shape of the jewel between his fingers, he pulled it up, expression wild and almost manic in his desperation, as he eyed the object, scarlet and dripping and still warm, he clutched it against his chest like a lifeline. 

Grimmjow wished for completion.

And drowned in sorrow. 

[...] 

Grimmjow snapped out of the memory with a flinch, feeling misery and regret cling to him like a second skin, he frowned, standing up to stretch his legs, looking to the people mingling around him in the hopes of spotting the colorful hair of his boyfriend, a few minutes had already passed from the hour they have set up to meet, and Grimmjow had to admit he was getting a bit restless, because he was no exactly patient, and also because the most recent vision refused to stop haunting him completely. 

He sighed, struggling to put an end to that train of thought, not noticing the figure approaching him carefully with a face full of mischief until… 

"Boo!" Grimmjow most definitely did  _ not  _ let out a strangled yelp, nor did he almost fell right into his face by jumping in alarm by the very stupid and childish antic of one Ichigo Kurosaki, that appeared to be having the best day of his life while laughing at his boyfriend expenses, arms wrapped around Grimmjow's waist as he moved along the startled male "Hello there, you big scaredy cat." He called out finally, expression mirthful as he stared right at him. 

Grimmjow felt the start of a blush trying to bloom across his cheeks, so he snarled instead, moving a hand quickly to take hold of orange hair and pushing down harshly the head of the other youngman "You trying to give me a heart attack, Kurosaki!?" 

The hissed question granted him a huff, as Ichigo struggled against the grasp he had on his head, breaking free and stumbling backwards, snickering "And people say I'm the dramatic one." 

Grimmjow tsked "Remember that when Yuzu or Karin tell you they are going on a date with someone and you end up freaking out about it,  _ again. _ " He replied simply, smirking by the frown now adorning the face of the redhead.

"That doesn't count!" Now was Ichigo's turn to hiss at him, pointing an accusatory finger at his chest "I'm an older brother, I have freaking out rights when it comes to the lives of my little sisters." 

"That isn't a thing." Grimmjow deadpans, hiding his amusement. 

"It sure is." Ichigo answers quickly and matter-of-factly "It's a non-written right for older brothers, are you an older brother?" He already knows that the answer to that will be a 'no', but he still waits for Grimmjow to shake his head before continuing, just to spite him "Then you don't have a say in what is, or isn't, a big brother right." He finishes, looking like a smug little shit once more. 

He is damn lucky Grimmjow loves him as much as he does, or he would have punched the living daylights out of him, instead, he merely rolls his eyes, grunting "Whatever," He shrugs "You decided where we're going this time, or did you forget it was your turn to chose the place today too?" His turn to look smug now. 

"Shut it," Ichigo warns him, getting close again "I forget about it once and you never stop rubbing it in my face." He mutters sourly, grabbing the taller male by the arm before starting to pull him along "Like, seriously, are you twelve or something?" 

Grimmjow snorts at that, matching Ichigo's pace easily "Says the guy who tried to scare me using the word 'Boo'." 

"Tried?" Kurosaki goads, Grimmjow furrowed his eyebrows. 

"Another word and we will spend this date having a fistfight." He warns and Ichigo snickers. 

"More like, spend it getting your ass beaten." The redhead is just making fun of him, but Grimmjow can see the confidence behind the statement and he can't quite control the shiver of delight the idea of actually having a fight with the man in front of him causes, so he takes a step to be face to face with Ichigo, looking down at him, lips curving. 

"You want to prove that?" 

Hazel eyes stare back at him, unblinking, acquiring a playful gleam, and Grimmjow knows Ichigo is considering it, but then he is closing what little distance was still left between the two and kissing him on the lips castily "Nice try, but no, we are going for dinner." A second later he is grabbing him by the hand and tugging him along again, still a bit drunk from the small contact, Grimmjow just follows, not even finding it in himself to feel disappointed "And just so you know, fighting in a parking lot is  _ not  _ as romantic as you think it is." 

"It's pretty hot, though." Grimmjow counters, smiling wide "At least you really seem to enjoy getting fucked up in a different way, once we finish those fights." 

Ichigo splutters indignantly after he says that, turning a pretty shade of red while hitting him on the arm harshly "Don't say stuff like that so casually, you bastard!" 

Grimmjow laughs. 

[...] 

They first met in a tavern. 

Grimmjow remembers the bustling of his men as they mingled around with other patrons, enjoying food and drinks as they relaxed while waiting for their next assault to happen, as the captain, Grimmjow had deemed it adequate to give them a chance to unwind and have some innocent fun, because as much as one could love the sea, there was nothing like spending time on land and with a good atmosphere. Besides, his contact had told him he would need to wait a bit on that village in particular, since the ship that carried the treasure he was after was bound to make a stop on that place soon. 

Grimmjow smiled while thinking of the pearl that was said to grant wishes, and all the benefits it could grant him, the power and advantage on his race to become the  _ king  _ of the seas, he aches for the grandeur of the title, the possibility of adventure and  _ violence  _ that would come with it. And he is full of exhilaration and expectation all at once. His musings are cut short by the sudden entrance of another crew, Grimmjow can't pinpoint something particularly interesting about them, they looked exhausted, like the ocean had dragged them to its depths and then spat them out, and it could be this was their first time making their way across the seas or that they have already spend  _ too  _ long cruising through its waters, in either case, Grimmjow felt compelled to wince in sympathy and laugh at their misery, he those neither of the two, settling for raising his cup as a signal of acknowledgement and to let his crew know that they will not mess with the newcomers,  _ yet.  _

He settles on his seat once more, letting his gaze flicker lazily through the faces he doesn't know, until he catches sight of someone that feels familiar and yet not, like something pulled out of a dream of night sky and sands adorned by the dying sun, and he can't hide his surprise or interest, so he decides to satisfy his curiosity by grabbing his drink and approaching the stranger. 

"Oi," He calls out, sitting in the chair next to him, the male turns to see him, tensing up and eyes going wide, the reaction seems uncalled for, unless Grimmjiw was right and they have met before somehow. Who knows? Maybe Grimmjow's crew had pillaged one of the ships the youngman had been a part of, talking about strong first impressions. Grimmjow smirks, threatening and a bit charming. 

"Can I help you?" The stranger asks, wary and hesitant, Grimmjow thinks is a smart attitude to have, but it still bothers him in a way he can't understand. 

"Maybe you can," He considers, taking a swing of his drink, getting the attention of the attendant moving around and requesting another one. 

"I don't see how that can be the case." The youngman glares at that, posture turning a bit more tense and hostile, Grimmjow frowns, getting impatient, the arrival of his new drink helps to distract him as he takes it and slides it towards the male with orange hair, the gesture grants him a look of suspicion that he answers by rolling his eyes. 

"You just seem familiar, that's all," Grimmjow shrugs carelessly "I just wanted to know if we have met before, no need to get all worked up about it. I don't bite." He takes another sip of his beer, gaze focusing in front of him "Unless you want me to." Azure eyes shine in mischief and he hides his smirk using the rim of his mug, next to him, he hears the man make a strangled sound, grabbing the cup in front of him harshly and taking a large gulp, coughing and then turning his face to the side. 

"I-Is that an attempt at flirting or…?" He asks after a while, he was frowning again, but his aggravation felt less impactful considering the blush spreading across his cheeks, Grimmjow snickers, just a little, but is enough to grant him a venomous glare, so the captain raises both hands in a sign of peace.

"Do you want me to flirt?" He shoots back, and the stranger snorts, tension leaving him bit by bit.

"What if I say yes?" The other side-eyes him, taking a measured sip this time around, looking regal and in control for the first time. 

It catches Grimmjow off-balance, and he opens his mouth, then closes it again, struggling to find how to answer to that. Honey eyes look at him, and the stranger laughs, the sound makes something to Grimmjow's heart and he almost forgets to feel angry about being taken as a fool. 

"Are you making fun of me or something?" He sneers, the laughter of the stranger dies down slowly. 

"Not at all," The redhead eyes his mug like it holds some kind of secret before he turns to look at him again, lips curved teasingly "I just find it ironic that you talk such a big game but freeze up after the person shows they might be interested for real." 

Grimmjow scoffs "Just 'might be interested?'" He questions, raising an eyebrow, oddly thrilled. 

The stranger grins "Yeah, I haven't seen anything worth my full interest yet." 

It was as much of an insult as it was a challenge, and it made Grimmjow tremble in excitement and anticipation, because this… this was certainly new, and captivating, just like the person next to him "I will make you change your mind, then."

Lips curl up in an amused smile and the redhead shugs down the rest of his beer "You can try." He looks sure of himself, standing up swiftly and walking away without sparing him another glance. 

Grimmjow can't help but get worked up about the very obvious challenge that was just thrown at him, he orders another round of drinks, smiling like a cat and considering how to get to the man that just left. 

—

They meet again the next afternoon, despite nursing a headache after a night of drinking, Grimmjow finds himself perking up the moment he catches sight of a familiar orange hair moving through the crowds that mingled around the harbour, saving boats that were just returning from a day of work or bigger ships getting ready to set sail towards the unknown, the pretty stranger is standing next to one of those bigger ships, Grimmjow recognized it was an impressive one, almost rivaling with his own, and he found his curiosity growing. 

"Seems like we were bound to meet again, mystery boy." Grimmjow taunts, smirking, as he blows a bit to the ear of the stranger. 

The other man jumps, letting out a surprised yelp and pulling out his sword on a quick reflex, swinging directly at Grimmjow, eyes going wide, the male with azure eyes stumble backwards, pulling out his own blade and blocking the blow. 

"Wow," Grimmjow found himself whispering "I call  _ that _ a good greeting." He praises, teasing and excited, pushing back and hearing the sound of metal grinding against metal. The stranger takes a step back, pulling his sword away a bit later, too. 

The redhead huffs, but Grimmjow can see the way his lips wobble in the attempt to form a tiny smile "You don't appear to feel as put-off as people usually are when you swing a sword at them with little provocation." 

"I'm not the kind of man to back away from a fight." He answers, carelessly, letting the hand still holding his sword to fall down at his side "And you?" He sneers, predatory. 

The stranger smirks. 

"I'm always up for a good fight." 

Azure eyes gleam, showing teeth and feeling his heart do something funny on his chest, Grimmjow takes a step forward, placing his blade up and directing towards the youngman with hazel eyes "Do you care to prove that right now?" 

The expression of the other man passes between surprise and excitement before settling in something a bit more composed, yet fierce "Are you serious?" He raises an eyebrow, Grimmjow shrugs in return, not putting his arm down. 

"You were not?" An obvious taunt, and the redhead scoffs, putting his sword up as well, grazing lightly against the weapon of the other. 

He sees the crowd starting to form around them, as if the prospect of tasting once more the exhilaration of having a rematch with the man that murdered him a few centuries ago had not been strong enough before, it was really impossible to ignore now, so the redhead swings again, lightly, giving a quick step forward. 

"You really are something else," He calls out, eyes blazing, heart burning with desire he had thought gone "And I don't mean that as a compliment!" 

Grimmjow laughs, returning the attack he just recieved "Well, at least I've got you interested now!" 

The stranger smiles. 

They fight. 

—

When they are done, they are both panting, still standing up, Grimmjow would have to admit he felt beaten despite the fact that he was still clutching at his sword and remaining on his feet, but the redhead had really put him on a difficult spot time and time again, he felt both afronted and delighted by the fact, though, the expression of open satisfaction that the other was showing him only helped to make the same funny feeling on his chest come back. 

"Was the fight worth it?" He finally asks, smug with the way the question makes the other turn away, making an expression that looked suspiciously like a pout. 

"...Maybe, yeah." He finally answers, voice strained. 

Grimmjow snickers "Mind getting a drink with me?" 

The stranger tenses, looking back at him sharply, he appears ready to deny the offer but stops to consider, finally relaxing "Sure, as long as you pay for it." His mouth tilts a fraction. 

Grimmjow finds it easy to comply. 

—

A few drinks later, with alcohol flowing through their veins, relaxed and bantering, they finally find it in themselves to make an official presentation. 

"Grimmjow Jeagerjaques, captain of the  _ Pantera _ ." Azure eyes narrow, prideful, looking intensely at his companion that raises a brow at him. 

"A pirate, huh?" He mumbles, taking a sip of his drink, like he isn't impressed at all, it makes something inside of Grimmjow howl "Well,  _ captain Jaegerjaques, _ I'm Ichigo Kurosaki."

There's simplicity, but also a strong sense of duty and pride accompanying that name. It's also oddly familiar, but Grimmjow can't come up for a reason for that odd sense of deja-vu, so he lets it pass. 

—

They continued to meet in different places of that small town, Grimmjow would be lying if he said that he wasn't the one seeking out a few of those encounters, but he would also murder anyone that dared to ask, so he didn't try to hide it either. 

In the end, it didn't really matter, their sparrs were fun, conversations an oddly beautiful change of pace, and Grimmjow had never been able to deny himself of the tiny pleasures that he wanted to have. 

It was a true blessing that his contact still didn't give him the signal that the ship they were after had not left yet, so he could allow himself this time. 

—

The first time they kissed feels almost like an accident, it tasted bitter from the alcohol, salty from their sweat, and oddly glorious. Like ambrosia. 

Grimmjow thought he could get addicted to it. 

—

They met for the last time a week later, all normal teasing banter and aggravation until Ichigo tells him that his crew is supposed to set sail again that afternoon, Grimmjow frowned at him, clicking his teeth harshly. Ichigo had looked up, unamused, placing a kiss on his cheek, and perhaps he thought it was not worth it to discuss about something that he knew was bound to happen, or he had truly gone soft like Di Roy had told him once or twice, but he felt the anger that had grown on him dissipate just as quickly. 

"I could just steal you away." He still commented casually, as they saw the waves crash and break against the shore, Ichigo hit him, as expected. 

"Don't say stupid stuff." The redhead warned "And  _ don't  _ try it either!" 

Grimmjow snorted, but it lacked energy, he felt like a little kid, petulant, holding tightly at Ichigo's hand and not planning on letting go any time soon, he heard the other sigh, moving closer and resting his head against his shoulder. 

"Hey." Ichigo said after a while, soft, looking up at him, certain "We will see eachother again, I'm sure of it." 

And Grimmjow hummed, eyes closing as he leans down to place a kiss on the forehead of the other, finding it easy to believe. 

"I will hunt you down the ends of the earth if I need to." He threatened, and Ichigo smiled. 

—

Grimmjow keeps him company until it's time for the other man to board his ship, and they bid farewell, Grimmjow's heart feeling heavy as he saw the ship disappear in the distance, between the blues and purples of the ocean, and the grays of the sky. 

_ A storm was approaching.  _

Then, he heard Di Roy calling out to him, bringing news about their target, how it was on the move and they had to set off asap if they intended to catch it. Grimmjow had no more time to dwell on the feeling of loss as he set off to find his destiny. 

—

Rain poured over them, cold and unforgiving, the ship moving at the mercy of the water as they invaded their target, Grimmjow's crew had been swift, unexpected thanks to the use of the storm to their advantage. Around him, the sound of battle was strong and as unforgiving as the wind and waves, he slashed one enemy after the other, feral and reckless, searching for the treasure he came to find. 

He finally caught sight of the box that was supposed to contain the pearl, if the information provided to him was correct, held tightly against the body of a man he couldn't exactly recognize, but that was fighting, intense and fiery, he approached quickly, dispatching of anyone that dared to get on his way, focused solely on the box and the jewel within it. 

Grimmjow raised his sword, ready to get rid of the last person between him and his treasure, and in his carelessness, he left himself open to an attack, he registered the pain before he saw the damage done to him, chest slashed open, wide and horrible, he stumbled back, sword held numbly between his fingers. In front of him, his opponent made a strangled noise, terrified by his own actions, Grimmjow thought he heard him say something, panicked, but he couldn't register it between the roaring in his ears. 

And then he was snarling and letting his sword move forward, unforgiving, cutting through skin and bone, and his victim left out a choked noise, spitting out blood. Finally, Grimmjow looked up, furious and hateful and… 

He encountered well-known hazel eyes, terrified and shocked and betrayed. 

_ Again Again Again.  _

Grimmjow felt sick. 

He stepped back, pulling his sword out quickly and hearing it clatter to the ground, Ichigo fell down, too, like a puppet with its strings cut down.  _ Unmoving. Dead.  _

Grimmjow found himself falling to his knees, and he thought he might be screaming, but he couldn't focus on anything but the cold spreading through the body he was holding and the red, red,  _ red  _ growing around them. His vision swam, from the blood loss and grief, and he was dying too.

But he didn't want to die,  _ not yet, not like this.  _

He was barely aware of how he reached for the box, careless to the horrors it had caused, and Grimmjow pried it open with clumsy fingers, grabbing for the pearl resting idly inside it, holding it close to his chest, desperate.

He wished for another day to fight. 

_ And never found a moment of peace again.  _

[...] 

Grimmjow gasped, stumbling a bit as he was brought out of the memories, he looked around frantically, clawing at his neck and chest, feeling like air wasn't reaching him. Unable to focus on his surroundings, and he couldn't… he couldn't… 

Someone grabbed his face, grip strong and comforting and he found himself staring at wide hazel eyes, concerned, Grimmjow flinched, guilty and ashamed. 

"Grimmjow, hey, Grimmy, it's okay." Soft words, Grimmjow found them soothing, grounding "You are okay, breath with me, alright? Like this." 

Azure eyes closed as he focused on following the instructions,  _ in  _ and  _ out _ , time and time again, until he was slumping forward, clinging to the figure in front of him, tightly, breathing deeply and letting himself enjoy the feeling of fingers moving through his hair. He finally moved away slowly, feeling more steady on his feet and letting out one last shuddering breath. 

"Grimmjow? Are you with me?" Ichigo asked slowly, giving him space but not letting go, the taller male nodded "Okay, take your time." 

Ichigo took the chance to move them to one of the tables that were set outside a café nearby, apologizing to the people that had seen the commotion, trying to reassure them that everything was fine at the moment and thanking them for their concern. He helped Grimmjow sit down and then moved to the chair at the other side, still holding one of Grimmjow's hands between his own. 

Finally, Grimmjow used his free hand to rub at his face, looking at him with tired eyes and squeezing at his hand. Ichigo squeezed back. 

"Fuck," He began, hoarsely, Ichigo snickered quietly "Sorry 'bout that, Strawberry." 

Grimmjow smiled at him, weak but teasing, Ichigo merely rolled his eyes, smiling fondly "That's okay, I've heard this place has pretty good desserts anyway." 

Grimmjow snorts. 

A pause, then "Are you feeling better, though?" 

"Yeah, yeah. Just…" Grimmjow made a vague gesture, still shaken from the visions assaulting and unable to look at Ichigo "Stress, you know?" 

Ichigo frowned, expression turning serious "Is this because of your recent  _ 'project'?"  _ He wondered, almost in a hiss. 

Grimmjow made a face of displeasure, cursing inwardly, this was the reason why he didn't like to bring forward issues regarding his work, at least, not recently, not since he started to investigate more about the  _ pearl _ , Ichigo never took well to it, always showing himself hostile towards the subject, resentful, despite denying it. Unable to hide it, still taken aback by the clear hatred of his lover, he nodded. 

Ichigo huffed. 

"I finished translating the scroll Nel got for me." Grimmjow commented, Ichigo raised an eyebrow. 

"Isn't that a good thing? I mean, you can add it to your research and move onto something else while more is found about that." There was something oddly hopeful in the way Ichigo had said that, almost pleading. Grimmjow shook his head still. 

"No, I can't let go of it just yet." He said, remembering the conclusion he came to that morning "I have to find it." 

Ichigo gapped, full of indignation, as if Grimmjow had just admitted a crime to him "What!?" 

Grimmjow hissed, feeling an unexpected pressure falling onto him, looking away, but he didn't backtrack "It's my only chance at finding answers!" He tried to justify, but it felt weak. 

Ichigo stared at him, terrified and somber in equal amounts " _ Answers?"  _ He muttered, poisonous, disbelieving and still feeling defeated "Of course,  _ of course!  _ There's always something to desire, huh!?" 

He snarled, accusing, hazel eyes blazing, Grimmjow reeled, confused and yet understanding. 

"What do you mean?" He demanded to know, and Ichigo smiled, sardonic, reaching for one of his pockets and rummaging around, looking away. 

"Why do you care?" He shot back.

Grimmjow bristled "Ichigo…" 

"Do you know what the worst part is?" Ichigo laughed, slumping forward, finally pulling out whatever he was looking for, looking at it with disdain and hatred, looking at the pearl, Grimmjow thought he might be sick "That I would have given it to you, time and time again, if you asked." 

Grimmjow felt the way his breath got caught in his throat, for the implications on Ichigo's words, because he was getting the answers he desired and he hated them, because this was probably his chance at getting it right and he… 

"But I don't think I can do this, not again." He continued, looking at him, aching, maybe a step away from crying. 

Grimmjow's breath hitched. 

[...] 

Grimmjow didn't mean to, he hadn't meant to push so hard, he had only wanted to take the pearl. Ichigo didn't understand, understand that he was doing it for them, so that they could be happy without having to run and fight. Grimmjow had only wanted to wish for their happiness. 

He had managed to make Ichigo fall into his death instead, Grimmjow looked to the street below then to the pearl held firmly between his fingers, feeling numb, he closed his eyes, taking a step over the edge. 

_ And wished for a chance to get things right.  _

[...] 

_ He was failing.  _

"Goodbye, Grimmjow." 

Those words registered in his brain, slowly, and he looked up, frantic, the chair in front of him was empty, and no matter where he looked, he just couldn't seem to find orange hair or hazel eyes, and ran, aimless and searching. Needing to find Ichigo. 

_ Needing to make it up to him.  _

Grimmjow searched. 

[...] 

He returned home well past midnight, tired and aching and still in the same position he had started, he had contacted every friend that he and Ichigo shared, and even those friends that were only Ichigo's and hated his guts, but none of them were able to give him answers of where the male with hazel eyes could be. 

Grimmjow felt defeated, the worst part of it was knowing this whole thing was his fault. 

He was not going to give in and accept it just yet, though, regardless of it all, Grimmjow was not someone who just lay down and accepted dead. He would fight tooth and nail for a chance to change fate or destiny or  _ whatever  _ bullshit that seemed to try and make him fail at this. 

He sighed, grumbling and letting himself fall into bed, exhausted while he gave a last read to the frantic messages he had sent to Ichigo. 

_ 'Kurosaki! Where the fuck did you go!?'  _

_ 'answer me damn it!'  _

_ 'don't you dare think im just letting you run away'  _

_ 'fucking answer me!'  _

_ 'im… im sorry, okay? for everything'  _

Grimmjow sigued, and fell asleep. 

[...] 

_ This felt familiar, somehow, the black corridor extending in front of him, white marble shining dully by the rays of moonlight that appeared to filter through the high windows scattered around, the surroundings appeared sketched out, though, somehow, as if reality was being barely held together by the seams, Grimmjow still marched forward, resolute, towards the source of a stronger light at the end of the corridor, when he finally stepped through the threshold, he encountered a chappel.  _

_ Stained glass depicting various images he couldn't make out gleamed prettily in a multitude of colors, a kaleidoscope extending miles and miles above his head, walls made of bone, pristine and shiny, blinding. He couldn't see a roof, only a source of light gleaming above everything, making him close his eyes or look away lest he wanted to not be able to see again, Gimmjow continued moving, then froze, hearing wind and thunder and feeling reality ripple up and tear as he looked up towards the light.  _

_ From within it, a figure started to form, in bits and pieces, covered in silks of black and white and red, carried by three sets of wings made of fire and feathers, framing a lean frame of tanned skin, powerful and beautiful, hazel eyes that looked like honey, sad and solemn and strands of bleeding sun flowing prettily around him.  _

_ Beautifull.  _

_ Grimmjow drowned in the sight, heart beating wildly in his chest, pulse rushing, he felt joyous and miserable as he looked up at the creature descending down from the heavens, palm stretched as he offered him the single thing that laid between them.  _

_ A black pearl, powerful and desired. _

_ Grimmjow focused on it, stretching his hand, so very close, and then…  _

_ He took hold of a strong wrist and pulled down, reaching for the lips of the creature.  _

_ Kissing him.  _

_ Forgotten, the pearl clattered to the floor, uncared, and the room creaked and started to fall apart, glass and bone rained as tears, tainting everything with light and color, consuming. And as reality turned appart around them, Grimmjow didn't let go, drinking the small whines Ichigo made, drowning himself in the other, holding him in a way that he hoped showed all of his passion and desire and shame. _

_ Wishing that, through this gesture, he could make up for a bit of the sorrow he caused him.  _

[...] 

Grimmjow woke up, feeling shaken and calm in the same breath, gasping and trembling, feeling out of his own skin and bones, blinking to the walls and sheets on his room, feeling the taste of sweet lips still clinging to him, the weight and warm of another body between his hands. 

From his bedside table, he caught sight of a pearl, and he reached for it with trembling fingers, picking it up and bringing it towards himself. He put it against his lips and wished for an answer. 

_ Next to him, his cellphone started to ring.  _

_ 'Strawberry' It showed.  _

_ Grimmjow smiled.  _

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> This is a mess but I'm tired, please accept it. :'3


End file.
